Scottish Green Party Members Expelled for Proclaiming “Sex Is a Biological Reality”

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In a shocking display of Orwellian doublethink, thirteen members of the Scottish Green Party have found themselves unceremoniously booted out for the audacious crime of declaring that “sex is a biological reality.”

The Rebellion of Reality-Recognizers

Former Scottish Greens co-convener, Robin Harper, has stepped forward to claim that the so-called ‘rebels’ were expelled under the guise of protecting trans members. In a delightful twist, Harper is now advocating for a coup against the current leadership, urging the party to ditch its gender-obsessed commanders and get back to saving the planet.

A Call to Environmental Arms

Harper, who led the party from 2004 to 2008 before dramatically shredding his membership card last year, revealed he’s been approached by several individuals keen on starting a breakaway party. This burgeoning interest follows the expulsion of 13 stalwart members, including seasoned campaigners who’ve dedicated over 40 years to the Greens. Their heinous act? Allegedly making the party less safe for trans and non-binary members by signing a declaration asserting women’s rights to sex-based protections under the Equality Act.

The Declaration of Controversy

The scandalous declaration also dared to state that “women and girls have the right to discuss policies which affect them without being abused, harassed, or intimidated.” Naturally, this caused a brouhaha among those who felt it violated party rules against undermining policy and perpetuating prejudice. Since 2018, the party has maintained a strict rule: “trans-exclusionary individuals of any kind are not welcome as members.”

Harper’s Laugh Riot

Harper, in an interview with the Sunday Post, scoffed at the claim that the expulsions were for trans members’ safety, labeling it “utterly laughable.” He explained, “We scrutinized that letter, sentence by sentence, to find any hint of aggression or criticism towards trans people. There was none. What needs to happen now is a vote of no confidence in the current leadership.”

The Infiltration of Ideologues

Harper alleges that the Green Party has been hijacked by a faction with political views starkly different from the party’s original environmental focus. He hopes that the remaining rational members can reclaim the party’s true mission: addressing environmental issues instead of getting entangled in gender politics.

The Echo Chamber of Censorship

In a world where stating the obvious has become a revolutionary act, the saga of the Scottish Green Party serves as a stark reminder of the perils of ideological purity. As Harper and his allies navigate this treacherous terrain, one thing is clear: the battle for the soul of the Green Party is far from over.

In the meantime, members and observers alike are left to wonder: will the Greens manage to extricate themselves from the quagmire of identity politics and return to their environmental roots? Or will they continue to alienate those who dare to acknowledge biological facts?

The Aftermath

For now, the expelled members, branded as heretics for their commitment to biological reality, face an uncertain future. Their plight highlights a growing rift within progressive movements, where adherence to ideological dogma often trumps common sense and open dialogue. As the Scottish Greens grapple with their identity crisis, the expelled thirteen stand as a testament to the dangers of ideological extremism.

In this brave new world, one thing remains certain: reality, it seems, is not only inconvenient but also highly controversial.

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