Ah, yes—climate change. The great multitasker of our time. It’s not just melting glaciers and turning summers into a game of “will I fry today?” anymore. Nope, according to the World Health Organization and AstraZeneca, climate change is coming to a doctor’s office near you! That’s right, folks, brace yourselves for the ultimate diagnosis: You don’t have a cold, you’ve got… climate change.
Got a cough? Must be the rising sea levels. Feel a bit feverish? That’s the greenhouse gases doing their thing. Shortness of breath? Forget asthma or allergies; you’re clearly suffocating from the CO2 emissions. And don’t even think about using a thermometer—that’s probably just recording global warming inside your body!
But wait, there’s more! AstraZeneca, the pharmaceutical giant that brought you vaccines, is now your climate guru. They’ll fix your carbon footprint with a pill, a shot, or—who knows?—maybe a “renewable energy” suppository. Don’t worry; it’s eco-friendly.
Forget Big Pharma. We’ve got Big Climate now, and it’s coming for your health chart.
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